Neediness

We all have needs. And we all have expectations. When I place my hope in another person to fill my need, I open myself up for disappointment and pain. My expectation that someone will fill my needs greatly affects how I relate to that person. I might be constantly trying to appease this person because if they became upset with me, they might not fill my need. Fear will become the motivating factor, fear of not having my needs met. I cannot truly be myself in this situation because my thoughts, my actions, are ruled by how I think the other person will respond to me. My source of life becomes the other person.

Freedom comes when I transfer my expectations from people to God. He is my Source. He is the One who fills all my needs. He may choose to use people to fill those needs, but my hope is not in people. They are not the source of my life. My confidence is in God, in His faithfulness. He has promised to meet my needs and He will stay true to His word, even though I may not know how He will do it. In this place I can be myself. My actions are not bound up in other people. They hold no power over me because they do not hold the key to the fulfillment of my needs. Love becomes the motivating factor in my relationships with people. I can love them freely, with no expectation of anything in return. And it allows me to love them honestly.